The FBI raided Senator Ted Stevens' home in Alaska apparently in order to inspect his wine cellar. Sounds like a lot of unnecessary trouble, actually. The FBI should have just asked Stevens what was in his collection. Most wine bores -- myself included -- you can't get them to shut up with a shotgun and duct tape.
It's easy to imagine fine wine becoming a tool of bribery for a self-important bigshot like Stevens. The process of justification would be a whole lot easier than actually taking money. After all, it's just a bottle of wine. You know, like the Kendall-Jackson Chardonnay friends bring when they come over for dinner. Except, of course, it's a fine wine because, well, because I'm a bigshot Senator and we're all gentlemen here.
I wonder what the FBI found and photographed in Sen. Stevens' basement. With no actual information, I'm going to take a guess: U.S. Senator...delusions of grandeur...highly conscious of one's status...we're probably talking First Growth Bordeaux in the $300 to $800 a bottle range. Maybe some Petrus, which is big with deep-pocket vulgarians. No doubt a few hotsie-totsie Burgundies: La Tache at $800 or so, others heading north from there. Of course, the vintages involved are likely to be old and memorable, since that's the kind of special gift that really bonds a self-sacrificing public servant and a rich-guy lobbyist. I'd bet we're looking at a few $3,000 bottles, all on the Senator's $165,000 base salary.
But no matter how much it's worth -- and a nice little 120 bottle fridge-full could top $100,000 pretty easily -- the justification process is easy. I mean, it's not like it's money. It's just wine, like the Kendall-Jackson...
If the feds found in Senator Stevens cellar what I'd be willing to bet they found, the Senator has got more to worry about than political fallout.
I'm confused. Kendall-Jackson is good, right. I think Consumer Reports liked it.
Posted by: NewMexiKen | 08/01/2007 at 07:04 PM
I'm disappointed Tom. You missed the whole Republicans + Corruption PLUS SEX angle. Obviously, a family values guy like good ole Ted, would be bribed with gifts of the Savanah porno chick wine! It's just like Kendall Jackson only better (because Bobby says so) and on those long 22 hour Alaskan nights, when it's only a lonely senator, the endless darkness and that bottle of with Savanah's pic....well you get the idea.
Really, I can't keep writing this stuff for you.
Posted by: Pursuit | 08/01/2007 at 07:23 PM
Nice post title though..
Posted by: Pursuit | 08/01/2007 at 07:24 PM
Nice post title though..
Posted by: Pursuit | 08/01/2007 at 07:24 PM
Nice post title though..
Posted by: Pursuit | 08/01/2007 at 07:25 PM
Nice post title though..
Posted by: Pursuit | 08/01/2007 at 07:25 PM