And Office Supplies. Don't Even Get Me Started On Office Supplies.

An investigation by Politico reveals that taxpayers are underwriting former President and embryonic billionaire Bill Clinton to the tune of more than $1 million a year.

Since 2001, Clinton has received more of almost every benefit available to former presidents — from his pension to his staff’s salaries and benefits to supplies. His $420,000 phone bill and $3.2 million office rent tab both nearly surpassed the totals rung up for those purposes by Bush, Carter and the late former presidents Gerald Ford and Ronald Reagan combined. As a group, they spent $484,000 on telephone service and $3.8 million on rent in the same span.

I'm sorry: $420,000 for a phone bill? Who's he calling? At 10-cents a minute -- and I'm guessing if he shops around he can fine a lower rate than that -- that's 4.2 million minutes. Over the course of seven years, that's 600,000 minutes a year which is 59 weeks of phone calls every single year, which doesn't even include local calls. Which means, assuming an 8 hour workday, 5 days a week, that at any given moment there are 5 people on the phone in Clinton's office talking long distance.

Assume a nickel a minute and there must be 10 people talking long distance all the time. What's he running, a telemarketing operation?

Hi, I'm calling from the office of former President Bill Clinton, and I was wondering if you need anyone to give a speech at your next corporate event?

Also contained in the report: News that it's costing us nearly a million dollars a year to support former President George H.W. Bush and -- hold onto your socks -- a half million a year in office support for Jimmy Carter.

Must need someone to handle all his fan mail.