FunctionalAmbivalent

The Answer Is: Nuclear

David Frum takes on the supposed panacea of solar and wind power:

The price of solar panels and wind turbines could fall to zero, and sun and wind power still could not compete in an unsubsidized marketplace, for three main reasons:

1) Unlike coal and nuclear plants, which can be sited near the point of energy consumption, the winds blow strongest and the sun shines brightest hundreds of miles from major energy markets. Renewable power would have to flow hundreds and thousands of miles to users. The cost of building a transmission system to move that power would be enormous—and is not susceptible to economies of scale.

2) Unlike coal, nuclear and hydro, which can generate huge quantities of electricity in a relatively small space, wind farms and solar facilities require enormous amounts of land—and vast networks of interconnecting wire. The land has to be bought or leased, the wires have to be strung and maintained. While technology costs tend to decline, the costs of land and labor do not.

3) Unlike coal and nuclear, which can be ignited at will, the sun does not always shine and the wind does not always blow. Since power cannot be stored in any significant quantity, a system based on sun and wind will require elaborate backup systems that are costly to build and operate.

The answer is, of course, nuclear power. Nuclear power is clean and safe and poses fewer significant safety problems than what we're using now. Every issue people have with nuclear energy has either been solved or can be solved with technology that exists today. Were we to work on the development of smaller, fail-safe nuclear plants with the same zeal we're working on solar and wind power, we could start hacking away at our carbon footprint right now, rather than at some point in the imaginary future. And we'd be doing it at a fraction of the price.

People are still afraid of nuclear energy and accepting of coal the same way they're afraid of flying instead of driving. Every bit of evidence suggests that nuclear energy is safer than coal, but we accept coal and reject nuclear because coal is familiar and nuclear is mysterious. Instead of using clean and safe technology that we already have at hand, we're banking on expensive technologies that pose huge problems -- including environmental problems. The result of that is that we're doing nothing to solve the very real problem of coal and oil dependency.

Because Being a Middle-Aged Man Just Isn't Humiliating Enough

The finger-shaped nose-hair trimmer.

Interesting Chart

The big burst of spending under Reagan was largely an increase in the Defense Budget and the big decrease under Clinton was primarily the "peace dividend" that current Republicans decry. (Mitt Romney, among others, complains about the decrease in defense spending after the fall of the Soviet Union, a position that is prima facie insane.) Still, giving and taking in a way most favorable to Republicans, it's hard not to reach the conclusion that while Republicans may win the rhetorical war on the deficit, the Democrats do better in the real world. The reason for this is, I think, that Democrats are willing to tax in order to spend, while Republicans would prefer to borrow.

The data on the chart from the federal government, and the chart is lifted from this website.

Loss of Perspective Watch: Little Pieces of History

Every time a new President comes into office, capitalism belches forth souvenirs. The assumption is that there's nothing too silly. Well:

Obama wall clock, with big black hands protruding from the fly of his pants.

Obama hot sauce to "Keep You Comin' Barack For More."

Obama light switch covers, so you can turn him on, too.

And, if that's not enough, an entire store dedicated to Obama crap.

The Swells Get a Little Less Swollen

Contemplating the economy, planners of the various inaugural balls prepare to sacrifice:

"We need to be very sensitive to appearances," said Debbie Dingell, president of the Michigan State Society, who talked about scaling back on champagne. "We won't have premium brand. There won't be shrimp, I'll be blunt."

The problem is not money; rich guys of all political stripes remain lined up to pay, as is evidenced by the sell-out of $18,000 corporate seats at the Indiana Inaugural Ball. (This is mysterious to me, by the way. I go to Indiana all the time and I can't think of anything there I'd pay $18,000 to own.) Still, one must be sensitive to appearances, what with the middle class collapsing and all.

At the state level, while five governors-elect have decided against expensive inaugural celebrations, the Governor-Elect of West Virginia has decided to plow forward, plans unchanged. While admission to most events will be free, the ball itself carries an impressive price tag: $50.

I, personally, think the most important celebration happens at noon on January 20th when, once again, the occupant of the most powerful office in the world changes, with no angry crowds massing or tanks rolling. The only military displays will be ceremonial and the opposition will be as welcome and optimistic as anyone else. It strikes me every time as little short of miracle.

The Most Completely False Thing Ever

If, after pissing away ridiculous amounts of money on pigs in a blanket, you still have money left over, how about coughing up $1,500 for two hours of being treated like a celebrity?

Celeb 4 A Day is a service that provides the everyday person with their very own Personal Paparazzi experience for birthdays, gag gifts, parties, bachelor & bachelorette parties, or ANY other event that requires The Star Treatment. Our belief is that the everyday person deserves the attention as much, if not more, than the real celebrities and nothing makes us happier than to be able to provide that service to each and every one of you. You deserve it - we know it.

The "Megastar" package includes limousine, 6 paparazzi photographers guaranteed to "shout your name," and a personal publicist to say "no comment" when the paparazzi shout questions that you've given them in advance. To help you get through the crowd of hired media jackals, you'll even have your own bodyguard.

When it's all over, they'll give you a CD of the no-doubt-humiliating photos.

I Spent $50 On the Damned Thing and Now I Can't Find It

That's one of the risks of owning a camouflage Bible; you might leave it in the yard and find that it blends in so well you're never going to be able to find it!

"Great for not only reading at home but also in a tree stand, ground blind, boat, or tent."

Available in both King James and New International versions. Here's some helpful information for give givers:

The NIV is by far the most used translation of the Bible among Evangelical pastors. The KJV is by far the most popular translation of the Bible among Pentecostals and Charismatics.

No word on which sects prefer the mossy oak breakup over the real-tree hardwoods green camouflage patterns.

The Stocking Stuffer That Says, "Why, No, I Didn't See What Happened In the Market Yesterday."

The $19,000 Caran d'Ache Behold 1010 fountain pen. Visit the Caran d'Ache website and see if you can get the flash link to work. I certainly couldn't.

Another Holiday Gift Item From People Who Don't Live In the Real World

The Dualit two-slice toaster from Williams-Sonoma. The just-upgraded cultural icon features one-side bagel toasting, a defrost setting, wider slots and electronic controls that operate each slot independently. Now on sale for $239.95. Four slice version only $319.95.

More From the Christmas Catalogues

Lobster Gram, fine seafood purveyors of Chicago, will sell you a 20-ounce can of chowder for $21.95.

For those of you on a budget, the also have Gourmet Franks in a Blanket, a dozen cocktail weenies (total weight, 7.2 ounces) wrapped in puff pastry "loved by kids and adults alike," for $17.95.

With standard shipping, that comes to $37.71, or just over $3 per cocktail frank.